Very Real Fashion News
Self-Proclaimed ‘Activist’ Wears Hemp Clothes He Bought From Amazon
Area activist bravely saves environment through series of large online purchases. He calls it “sustainable shopping.” His friends call it “just shopping.”
Shein Promises To Go Eco-Friendly By 2750
In a bold move sure to inspire other brands to do their part, the fast fashion brand Shein has announced its commitment to going eco-friendly by the year 2750.
Distressed Jeans Are Just Emotionally Processing the 2,000 Gallons They Took to Exist
Distressed jeans are speaking out. Inside a church basement, denim gather weekly to confront the emotional toll of fast fashion, one frayed hem at a time.
Shocking Survey Reveals 80% of Punks Have No Idea That Punk Isn’t Just About Fashion
A shocking new survey reveals that punk is less about smashing the system and more about smashing the like button. This blog explores the tragicomic decline of a counterculture now best represented by $150 ripped jeans and a vague memory of Avril Lavigne.
Local Man Calls In Sick To Work Because He 'Felt an Emotion'
In a shocking turn of events, local man Rene Romero called in sick after experiencing what experts are calling “an emotion.” Coworkers are reportedly in disbelief, struggling to comprehend how someone so famously unfeeling could fall victim to basic human sentiment.
What Happens When You Recycle Your Clothes
The Adventures of a Recycled Sock. You might think your old socks are embarking on a scenic journey to the afterlife, but no— they’re being shredded, mangled, and reincarnated as a child’s smock. It's like a midlife crisis for your laundry, only with more polyester and fewer regrets.
